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5 Tips for Improving Communication in Your Child with Special Needs

6/11/2018

45 Comments

 
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It is exciting times. Our son Richie who has autism is sixteen-years-old and has started using words to communicate. We know we have a long way to go before he starts using full sentences, but this is an amazing start. Especially, when I was told by professionals that Richie would never speak when he was diagnosed with autism at age two. In this post I'll be sharing some of the methods we've been using to help facilitate Richie's ability to communicate with us and others. 
Our family believes Richie will develop an effective way to communicate with us that he will use and rely on independently. We believe he will be gainfully employed and we believe he will live a life as independent as possible. We don’t know for certain what kind of life Richie will have, but what we do know is that as a family, we will never give up on him. 
I once had a speech therapist tell me at an IEP meeting that “Richie wasn’t interested in communicating with us.” I remember I had to take a moment to think carefully about how I would answer. Then I replied, “I respectfully disagree.” She looked at me with a surprised look on her face and said, “you disagree?” 
Of course, I disagreed with her.  We ended the IEP meeting on civil terms despite our differences.  I can understand that perhaps based on Richie’s body language that it’s easy to conclude he isn’t interested in communicating with us.  However, Richie has always demonstrated a strong interest in speech. Richie sings, repeats movie phrases, words, things we say around the house (we learned this the bad way!), he uses gestures often and hand leads us to what he wants. All these things express a genuine interest in communicating with us. We shouldn’t confuse one’s inability to do something with their desire to do it. I have been using the following tips working with Richie to improve his communication skills for years. I fully expect him to continue to make progress, find his voice and use it.  

Here are some tips I hope you find helpful for increasing and improving expressive (express yourself using language) and receptive (comprehension of what is being said to you) language:

  •  Make a list of the words and phrases your child understands (receptive) and can speak (expressive). Naturally, the receptive list will be longer than the expressive. This list provides a good foundation for improving language. Use it as a guide for focusing on the expansion of words to teach or improve. For example, when Richie has an itch, he’ll point to the itchy area and say, “itchy, itchy.” Of course, when he says this, we’ll scratch his arm, leg, head, etc.  To teach Richie more words, we decided to teach him to say, “want scratch.” So when he does have an itch, we’ll get him to say “want scratch” and then we’ll scratch the itchy area. It’s important to teach our kids the value of language. Why should they try to rely on it if it doesn’t work for them? 
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  • Take pictures of household items (table, refrigerator, television, lamp, etc.), things around your home and label them. This helps to improve picture-word association. It also helps to improve your child’s vocabulary. It was especially helpful to have taken actual pictures of our household items because it was already familiar to Richie. I also have a visual schedule and chore board for him to refer to on a daily basis. 
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  • Create a Communication Book. If you’re using the PEC (Picture Exchange Communication) System, then you’re already giving your child an outlet to communicate. I use a variation of PECS. I made a picture book of actual pictures (Richie didn’t do well with the cartoonish looking ones). I have a section for breakfast, lunch, snacks, and dinner foods. I have a section for restaurants and their picture menu’s. I have a section of preferred activities (pictures of Richie doing his favorite things – going swimming, swinging on a swing, going to Busch Gardens, or playing with his iPad. I have a section of Richie doing his different chores (taking out the garbage, recycling, etc.).  Creating this book will help your child to make choices and communicate their preferred activity, place to visit, or food to eat. Tip: Make sure the choices available are ones that can actually be fulfilled. Remember we want our children to value the power of any communication method used. If they choose to go the beach and you’re not able to take them, then this form of communication may seem ineffective to them. 
  • I also took pictures of things we always have in our refrigerator and pantry. I attached them to the fridge and pantry door with Velcro, this way if Richie wants a specific snack or drink, all he has to do is pull the picture and bring it to us! Once he mastered bringing us the picture of his desired snack or drink, we stepped it up by asking him to try to say the word as best as he can. He's usually pretty good at repeating the word. 
  • Create a Conversation Book.  Often, people with autism or other developmental disabilities that interfere with communication and socialization, don’t get to engage in ordinary conversation with others. A friend who is a colleague and behavior analyst gave me the idea for this tip! A conversation book gives Richie the opportunity to share facts about himself and his interests with others. He asks to engage with others using the conversation book often. Please feel free to use this template to create your own. It's not a pdf so you can tailor it to your loved one's interests. 
Every child and person with a disability learns to communicate on their own time. There is no age limit or universal clock silently ticking away to a talk deadline! Don’t let anyone convince you that if your child hasn’t started talking by five-years-old, then the likelihood is that they never will. That is utter nonsense. Children and adults have started talking or learned to master some form of communication long after their fifth birthday! All you need to do as a parent is what you’ve been doing all along. Love your child, have patience with your child, and work on ways to expand and improve their vocabulary. Once your child learns the value of language, communication will inevitably follow. 

Sincerely, Christine SensoryFriends

45 Comments
Cassie
6/19/2018 10:38:31 pm

Kudos to you and your son for coming so far since his diagnosis. These are great tips

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Christine Goulbourne link
7/4/2018 11:07:36 pm

Thank you for your kind words, Cassie!

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Kim
6/19/2018 11:40:09 pm

This is so informative. I love these tips, especially the communication by pictures. What a great idea!

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Christine Goulbourne link
7/4/2018 11:08:55 pm

Thank you for commenting Kim. Many kids with developmental or sensory disabilities communicate better with visuals.

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Kim
6/19/2018 11:40:53 pm

I love these tips, especially the communication by pictures. What a great idea!

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Athena link
6/19/2018 11:52:10 pm

I really like the idea of the communication book. As a generation we are visual more than ever now.

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Christine Goulbourne link
7/4/2018 11:09:48 pm

Thank you, Athena. I thought the behavior analyst's idea was a brilliant one too!

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Wander With Ola link
6/20/2018 01:15:52 am

This is such a great article, with lots of awesome tips. Create a Communication and Conversation book sounds like a good idea!

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Christine Goulbourne link
7/4/2018 11:12:38 pm

Yes, so many kids like Richie don't have that connection with others, a communication book gives them the opportunity to connect with us!

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Nabanita Dhar link
6/20/2018 01:40:15 am

You make some very valid points here.
The point you mention about every child taking their own time is so true. It will be good if we all remember that.

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Christine Goulbourne link
7/4/2018 11:13:21 pm

Many parents are sadly led to believe that there is a deadline of some kind, but everyone reaches milestones at different times.

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ipsita paul
6/20/2018 01:44:17 am

That's exciting news! Your post is really nice. Keep up!

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Christine Goulbourne link
7/4/2018 11:13:43 pm

Thank you so much for stopping by!

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cris link
6/20/2018 03:36:04 am

Communication is so very important for every child! You have some great tips over here. I will make sure to share it with my friends.

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Christine Goulbourne link
7/4/2018 11:15:00 pm

Thank you for your kind words and support!

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Tau Kelvin link
6/20/2018 04:29:14 am

Thank you so much, this was super helpful.

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Christine Goulbourne link
7/4/2018 11:17:10 pm

Thank you - please feel free to share as appropriate!

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Andrea Comala link
6/20/2018 06:16:03 am

It take a lot of patience to communicate with a special needs child and I think it's a beautiful thing once you are able to communicate. I think it was very rude for that therapist to say he "didn't want to communicate" SMH. Thank you for sharing your experience and tips.

http://andiesparkles.com/

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Christine Goulbourne link
7/4/2018 11:16:12 pm

Thank you, Andrea. You'd be surprised to learn of what things are said to special needs parents by professionals about their children. Luckily, not all behave this way, we're working with some fabulous talent now.

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Rosalinda link
6/20/2018 12:39:36 pm

Richie is so lucky to have y'all as family. Y'all believe in him and work so hard to make sure he has everything he needs to be successful. Amazingly sweet.

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Christine Goulbourne link
7/4/2018 11:16:37 pm

Thank you so much for your kind words!

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Tara link
6/20/2018 01:29:24 pm

It is so great that you have been able to work with your son and surpass doctors expectations. My daughter was slow to speak when she was young, she only wanted to say words she could say perfectly. We have problems with school work, because she only wants to answer if she knows it perfectly - perfectionism, who knew it was such a problem. She is getting better. She is a fantastic artist too.

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Christine Goulbourne link
7/4/2018 11:26:09 pm

Thank you for visiting and sharing a little about yourself with us! There are so many strategies used for helping kids with autism and other special needs on how to excel academically. I would love to know what has been successful for you and your daughter.

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Amber Myers link
6/20/2018 02:51:04 pm

I love these tips! I used a lot of them for my son, who has autism. They did help a lot. He didn't really start to speak until he was close to 4.

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Christine Goulbourne link
7/4/2018 11:28:21 pm

That's wonderful! Thank you for stopping by.

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Joan Cajic link
6/20/2018 04:10:44 pm

Wow, good on you to trying exciting ways to assist your son, these are really great by the way.

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Christine Goulbourne link
7/4/2018 11:28:50 pm

Than you so much for your supportive comment.

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Valerie link
6/20/2018 05:23:51 pm

Love this. .I too have a 9 yr old with special needs and it makes for long days at a times.

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Christine Goulbourne link
7/4/2018 11:32:06 pm

I know of the long days too, it's something that often times is only understood by other special needs parents. Thank you for sharing and stopping by.

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Le link
6/20/2018 05:38:04 pm

These are great tips and can come in handy since I occasionally nanny for families with special needs.

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Christine Goulbourne link
7/4/2018 11:32:29 pm

Thank you for stopping by!

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Kusum link
6/21/2018 12:36:41 pm

First of off kudos to you and your son! It is so nice of you to share your tips and experiences with other!

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Christine Goulbourne link
7/4/2018 11:27:42 pm

Thank you for your kind words!

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Terri Beavers link
6/21/2018 03:51:35 pm

This is such a helpful article. I know someone who has an autistic son. He's an adult now and not doing as well as your son. Maybe your post could help his parents in the steps they need to take.

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Christine Goulbourne link
7/4/2018 11:23:34 pm

Thank you for visiting. Not all families have the support they need, and not all programs or methods are a good fit for everyone. Treatment for autism should be individualized, as well as person and family centered.
Please let your friend know I'm happy to be a resource and friend.

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Fely link
6/21/2018 05:45:34 pm

My daughter has a speach delay and soon is going to be tested for autism. I’m nervous about it and it’s outcome but I see you mommies doing all these activities and things to help them. Gives me some strength as to what is to come. Thanks for this.

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Christine Goulbourne link
7/4/2018 11:21:53 pm

Thank you for sharing a little about you as well. I have a great post on first finding out your child has autism that might be helpful to you. Take care, friend.

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LavandaMichelle
6/22/2018 12:58:14 am

Wow, this is the work of a promising parent! You are so admirable. Thank for sharing these tips, they are amazing! :)

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Christine Goulbourne link
7/4/2018 11:19:37 pm

Your words mean so much, thank you!

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Princess Quinn
6/22/2018 03:24:29 am

Very good idea, Communication nowadays is very important can make the little children more confident when we started teaching them in their early stage.appreciated much it really works!

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Christine Goulbourne link
7/4/2018 11:11:28 pm

I agree, I couldn't imagine what it's like not to be able to share a thought or idea. I love that there are new ways for facilitating communication being developed.

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Nina link
6/22/2018 12:59:27 pm

true. i absolutely agree with the points. it is essential in improving and nurturing the bond and communication :) thank you for sharing

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Christine Goulbourne link
7/4/2018 11:10:24 pm

Thank you for visiting and commenting Nina!

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kim brooks
7/5/2018 01:40:59 pm

such a great read thank you for the tips they are awesome and will very much help out!

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Valentina Harris link
8/9/2018 03:14:38 am

Thank you for sharing such a touching and informative story on such an important subject.

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