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“The Positive Side of Family Life with Autism: Celebrating Success is an Everyday Thing”

4/9/2017

10 Comments

 
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If I had a quarter for every time someone said they were sorry after learning I have a son with autism, I would have a small fortune! It’s true that having a child with autism has its challenges, but because of a supportive family, great friends, the expertise and guidance from colleagues, and a team of compassionate and talented educators, Richie is doing great. And all is good because we see the positive side to family life with autism. 

Positive views on our lives and beyond

Over the years, we’ve had quite a few learning curves handling so many different situations. We had to learn about how to approach Richie’s challenging behavior, how to help him overcome his struggle with communication, and how to improve his quality of life. At first, we had some dark times before we knew about what worked for us. Using the positive behavior support process helped tremendously with Richie’s aggressive behavior.  We learned how to approach Richie when he was angry, redirect his aggression, praise his good behavior, teach him ways to communicate with us, and teach him new skills as well. But what happened while we did this process was an amazing thing. We all learned how to approach each other more positively. We are more conscious of one another’s feelings and we’re more supportive of one another. I learned that if my husband offers to prepare dinner, not to get annoyed when he makes an incredible mess of the kitchen (I clean up during and after preparing meals). I learned to thank him and ask for his help with cleaning the kitchen. Teaching Richie about having manners has us all on our toes about our own manners. I don’t think any of us forget to say “please and thank you” to one another anymore. Taking the positive behavior support approach not only improved Richie’s quality of life, but it improved our overall family’s quality of life. 

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Compassion, Acceptance and Inclusion Became our Mantra

There is not one member of our family who doesn’t feel that having Richie in their lives made them a better person. We all learned about being sensitive and respectful of the many differences, needs, and uniqueness of others. We all learned about how to celebrate the varying abilities and strengths of others, and we support them.  We all learned that making even the smallest of changes in any activity can make it possible to include anyone to join in – no matter their level of ability. Richie having autism has turned our family into active members of our community who genuinely care about others. 

Increasing Awareness and Educating others comes naturally

We have become quite the advocates in our family! Each of us have had an opportunity to teach another about autism and about Richie, his needs and talk more about who he is. Richie is more than a kid with autism. As a special needs blogger and advocate, I love helping other parents with navigating the special education process. I remember having no one in my corner during the early IEP (Individual Education Plan) years, and now I get to help parents so they don’t have to feel alone. My daughter Samantha and her husband Phil is always redirecting others to resources they knows helped their brother. My step-son Tiki is constantly reminding his fellow 6th grade classmates not to use the “R*****” word, and my husband Kirk is proud to brag about his family to friends and people he meets at work. He tells them of our site, Sensory Friends, talks about Richie with others and what’s worked for him successfully at home.
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Then there’s Richie. He is the reason we are the family we’ve become. We all volunteer, we all participate in community activities and we all see the positive things in our lives and we have Richie to thank for it. 
The Positive Side to Family life with Autism - Featured Special Needs Blog Hop
Welcome to Voices of Special Needs Blog Hop -- a monthly gathering of posts from special needs bloggers hosted by The Sensory Spectrum and The Jenny Evolution. Click on the links below to read stories from other bloggers about having a special needs kiddo -- from Sensory Processing Disorder to ADHD, from Autism to Dyslexia! 

Want to join in on next month's Voices of Special Needs Hop? 
Click here!
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Sincerely, Christine SensoryFriends

10 Comments
Full Spectrum Mama link
4/11/2017 09:02:26 am

YES! I really do feel like my children's differences have opened up the world to us and opened all of our hearts.

We may not always find that the rest of the world is in the same place, but, like you, we make the extra effort to try to help it get there...

Thanks and love,
Full Spectrum Mama

Reply
Christine Goulbourne link
4/12/2017 01:41:30 pm

Thank you for your kind comment! I couldn't agree more.

Reply
Valerie link
4/11/2017 10:46:11 am

Love this post – as a sister of an (adopted) brother with autism, I can't imagine our family life being any different. He's a challenge at times, but the best kind!

Reply
Christine Goulbourne link
4/12/2017 01:43:23 pm

Thank you for visiting Valerie. I think people like your brother and my son serve as constant reminders that we have to care about and help one another.

Reply
Lecy | A Simpler Grace link
4/11/2017 12:18:09 pm

I LOVE that you are writing about the positive aspects of having a child with a special need. Too many people focus on the negative things or challenges when there are so many things to be grateful for. I have a niece on the autism spectrum and it's so rewarding to see her learn and grow every day, so thank you for sharing your story! <3

Reply
Christine Goulbourne link
4/12/2017 01:45:05 pm

Thank you Lecy. Your niece and my son teach us every day about the amazing things they can and will learn to do.

Reply
Alexandra
4/11/2017 02:05:27 pm

"There is not one member of our family who doesn’t feel that having Richie in their lives made them a better person." What a timely blessing for me to read this. We have a newly-diagnosed little one in the family.

Reply
Christine Goulbourne link
4/12/2017 01:48:52 pm

Thank you for visiting and commenting Alexandra. Please feel free to contact me if you have any questions or you're looking for resources.

Reply
Lisa link
4/11/2017 04:15:32 pm

Thank you for sharing your story. My daughter's school is doing a great job building awareness this month with the kids. I volunteer like your family and have an advocacy portion of my page if you'd like to collaborate sometime.

Reply
Christine Goulbourne link
4/12/2017 01:51:46 pm

Thank you Lisa. I would love to collaborate with you. Let's get in touch!

Reply

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    Author: Christine Goulbourne
    christine@sensoryfriends.com 

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